LootCrate – first impressions April 2014

As I have more than a passing interest in gaming and geek culture I took the plunge and signed up for Loot Crate.
Looking over previous crates it would appear that $30 a month may well yield some fun items, so repeat after me the Loot Crate mantra of ‘document/share/enjoy‘ and I’ll get started.

In the words of detective Mills from se7en when faced with John Doe’s last act, what’s in the box?


Well, all in all, a shit load of disappointment, my $30 produced the following in my mailbox:

  • Elder Scrolls Nord plastic figure
  • Game of Thrones random mini figure
  • d20 stress ball
  • d20
  • Dragon Jerky
  • Dragon Slayer dog tags
  • Dragon Shield screen-wipe

Elder Scrolls Online plastic Nord figure.
A Nord? Fantastic – a really shitty looking cartoony Nord. Of all the possible ES creations we get a Nord; which quite frankly is stretching the dragon theme.

Ugh. Shite Nord figure

The really poor Nord figure.

Verdict? In the bin.

Game of Thrones mini plastic figure.
Not too bad, but I end up with a dire wolf out of the 22 really good looking figures. I suppose it’s a 1 in 24 chance of getting something decent and I was unlucky.

Look! 22 decent figures out of 24.

Look! 22 decent figures out of 24.


Bad luck! Your mystery figure was a dire wolf.

Verdict? In the bin.

D20 stress ball.
It’s a reasonable novelty item and my cats like to chase it.

Two d20s. One for cats and one to choke infants with.

Two d20s. One for cats and one to choke infants with.

Verdict? The cats can have it.

Yes a d20. I wasn’t expecting duplication, especially as the dragon theme is a bit tenuous with both d20 items.
Verdict? In the bin.

Dragon jerky.
Oh delightful, processed meat products. Astonishing that it made through Customs at Melbourne, considering how strict they are about foreign meat products.

Dragon Jerky - patiently waiting to be thrown in the bin.

Dragon Jerky – patiently waiting to be thrown in the bin.

Verdict? In the bin.

Dog Tags. Yes, they really are as shot as they look.

Just horrible….

Dragon Slayer dog tags.
Just really cheap and nasty with absolutely no redeemable features. Total crap.
Verdict? In the bin.

Dragon shield screen-wipe.
Yeah, sticks to the back of your phone and peel off to use. Not exactly convienient and hardly compliments my Alex Grey case.

Dragon shied screen-wipe. Really add to 'Oversoul' don't you think?

Dragon shield screen-wipe. Really adds to ‘Oversoul’ don’t you think?

Verdict? In the bin.

$30 bought me a cat toy?
Shame on you LootCrate, I’ll give you two more chances to redeem yourself and then we’re done.


~ by judascow on May 2, 2014.

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